Howdy. We're the Democratic Party. Remember us? We used to be in charge in Congress. We're the ones who proved that with a majority in both houses and a president of the same party in the White House, our government still can't get anything accomplished.
But we're not here to talk about that. No sir. We're here to talk about value for your tax dollar... Entertainment value.
Those Republicans may jaw on about Fred Thompson and Sonny Bono, but what have these junior members of our leadership really done since they got to Washington? Make a couple of speeches, look pretty for the cameras? That's entertainment?
Look at what we've done for you. Back in 1993, when Bill Clinton took office, we fulfilled our pledge to bring you quality political entertainment. People don't like to watch the evening news, so we turned it into two fun games... "Guess The President's Position Today" and "What Will Bill Back Down From Next?" I'm sure some of you even won money in an office pool on those.
On top of that we've provided you with the Mel Reynolds sex scandal, the fishy and mysterious deaths of Vincent Foster and Ron Brown, and our own political soap-opera, "The Whitewater Chronicles." Plus we had a fun game for the kids... "How Much Can The President Eat?"
The Republicans can talk about entertainment value, but we're the ones who really deliver. So when it comes time to cast your vote in November, vote for us.
The Democrats: Political Fun & Hijinks For The Whole Family!
NOTE: Yesterday we featured a message from the GOP (click here to read it). So today, in the interests of equal time...
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